80 Sarcastic Quotes about Life to Make You Laugh

Sarcastic quotes about life are a popular way to poke fun at the many challenges and absurdities of existence. These quotes often use irony and humor to make a point or to offer a different perspective on a familiar subject. Some sarcastic quotes about life are light-hearted and playful, while others are more biting and critical.

Sarcasm can be a powerful tool for coping with difficult or frustrating situations. By using sarcasm, we can express our frustration or disappointment in a way that allows us to maintain our composure and sense of humor. Sarcasm can also be a way to cope with the many challenges and obstacles that life throws our way. By using sarcasm to make light of a difficult situation, we can find a measure of relief and release.

In this article, we will explore some of the most memorable and thought-provoking sarcastic quotes about life. These quotes come from a range of sources, including famous writers, comedians, and everyday people who have faced challenges and used sarcasm to cope with them. Whether you’re looking for a source of humor or a moment of reflection, sarcastic quotes about life can provide valuable insights and perspectives on the human experience.

80 Sarcastic Quotes about Life

“Do you think God gets stoned? I think so. Look at the platypus.”

Robin Williams

“A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.”

Winston Churchill

“Life is hard; it’s harder if you’re stupid.”

John Wayne

“If you’re going to tell people the truth, be funny or they’ll kill you.”

Billy Wilder

“If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.”

Dalai Lama.

“Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until they speak.”

Steven Wright

“People kept saying ‘Go Corona Go’ and it went to other countries to spread across the globe.”


“People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.”

A. A. Milne

“An optimist thinks that this is the best possible world. A pessimist fears that this is true.”

Robert Oppenheimer

“I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.”

Whitney Brown

“Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence.”

Ashleigh Brilliant

“You know the difference between a tornado and divorce in the South? Nothing! Someone’s losing a trailer, number one.”

Robin Williams

“My mother always used to say: The older you get, the better you get, unless you’re a banana.”

Rose (Betty White)

“I’m such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own.”

Woody Allen

“I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly.”

Sir Winston Churchill

“Age is of no importance unless you’re a cheese.”

Billie Burke

“It’s always darkest before it turns absolutely pitch black.”

Paul Newman

“Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?”

Robin Williams

“People are prisoners of their phone that’s why it’s called a “cell phone.”


“The four most beautiful words in our common language: I told you so.”

Gore Vidal

“Marriage is give and take. You’d better give it to her or she’ll take it anyway.”

Joey Adams

“Education is what remains after one has forgotten everything he learned in school.”

Albert Einstein

“The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech.”

George Bernard Shaw 

“Marry me and I’ll never look at another horse!”

Groucho Marx

“I don’t have a welcome mat at my door because I’m not a liar.”


“A man in love is incomplete until he has married. Then he’s finished.”

Zsa Zsa Gabor

“The advantage of having only one child is that you always know who did it.”

Erma Bombeck

“I don’t like irony and sarcasm very much. But I do like it when you think someone is telling you a joke, and then you discover it’s serious.”

Jens Lekman

“There are some people who come in your life pretending that they love you only because they need you.”

Uzair Lallmamod

“Some family trees bear an enormous crop of nuts.”

Wayne H

“The road to success is always under construction.”

Lily Tomlin

“There’s no secret about success. Did you ever know a successful man who didn’t tell you about it?”

Kin Hubbard

“Marriage is a romance in which the heroine dies in the first chapter.”

Cecilia Egan.

“I feel so miserable without you, it’s almost like having you here.”

Stephen Bishop

“I know family comes first, but shouldn’t that mean after breakfast?”

Jeff Lindsay

“Half the world is composed of idiots, the other half of people clever enough to take indecent advantage of them.”

Walter Kerr

“I am so clever that sometimes I don’t understand a single word of what I am saying.”

Oscar Wilde

“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.”

Oscar Wilde

“Calamities are of two kinds: misfortunes to ourselves, and good fortune to others.”

Ambrose Bierce

“The informality of family life is a blessed condition that allows us all to become our best while looking our worst.”

Marge Kennedy

“You’ve got to be very careful if you don’t know where you are going, because you might not get there.”

Yogi Berra

“If you haven’t got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me.”

Alice Roosevelt Longworth

“The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces.”

Will Rogers.

“History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all other alternatives.”

Abba Eban

“I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn’t work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.”

Emo Philips

“Parents are the last people on earth who ought to have children.”

Samuel Butler

“Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition.”

Marilyn Monroe

“If you ever become a mother, can I have one of the puppies?”

Charles Pierce

“In some families, ‘please’ is described as the magic word. In our house, however, it was ‘sorry’.”

Margaret Laurence

“A pessimist is a man who thinks everybody is as nasty as himself, and hates them for it.”

George Bernard Shaw

“I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn’t it.”

Groucho Marx

“Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.”

Margaret Mead.

“I believe in luck: how else can you explain the success of those you don’t like?”

Jean Cocteau

“Insanity is hereditary; you get it from your children.”

Sam Levenson

“Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing.”

William James

“I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones.”

Albert Einstein

“If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There’s no point in being a damn fool about it.”

W. C. Fields

“When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.”

Will Rogers

“Well, if I called the wrong number, why did you answer the phone?”

James Thurber

“I am a bit sassy, with some sarcasm thrown into the mix, but stoic at the same time – and brash.”

Mike Daniels

“I went to the general store but they wouldn’t let me buy anything specific.”

Steven Wright

“I came from a real tough neighborhood. Once a guy pulled a knife on me. I knew he wasn’t a professional, the knife had butter on it.”

Rodney Dangerfield

“I believe in rules. Sure, I do. If there weren’t any rules, how could you break them?”

Leo Durocher

“I cannot afford to waste my time making money.”

Louis Agassiz

“Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.”

Will Rogers

“That’s why they call it the American Dream, because you have to be asleep to believe it.”

George Carlin

“Laugh and the world laughs with you, snore and you sleep alone.” 

Anthony Burgess

“Listen, smile, agree, and then do whatever you were gonna do anyway.”

Robert Downey Jr.

“My doctor gave me six months to live, but when I couldn’t pay the bill he gave me six months more.”

Walter Matthau

“Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than going to a garage makes you an automobile.”

Billy Sunday

“You can always tell when a man is well informed. His views are pretty much like your own.”

H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

“Having a child makes you a parent; having two, you are a referee.”

David Frost

“Everything is changing. People are taking the comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke.”

Will Rogers

“The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you’re still a rat.”

Lily Tomlin

“Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.”

Thomas Eddison

“Some are born mad, some achieve madness, and some have madness thrust upon ’em.”

Emilie Autumn

“When I hear somebody sigh, ‘Life is hard,’ I am always tempted to ask, ‘Compared to what?’”

Sydney J. Harris

“Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I’m not sure about the universe.”

Albert Einstein

“When something goes wrong in your life, just yell ‘Plot Twist’ and move on.”

Molly Weis.

“If you’re too open-minded, your brains will fall out.”

Lawrence Ferlinghetti

Wrapping Up

Sarcastic quotes about life offer a humorous and often poignant perspective on the challenges and absurdities of existence. By reading and contemplating these quotes, we can gain a deeper understanding of ourselves and the world around us and find the strength and humor to navigate the ups and downs of life.

Whether you’re looking for a source of laughter or a moment of reflection, quotes about life can provide valuable insights and perspectives on the human experience.

Dani Rhys